Growing up, I was told, “You’re too sensitive — you’ve got to toughen up!”
Did you hear this too?
Besides it being a mild form of verbal abuse, it’s also not true.
You are simply as sensitive as you are…saying you are too sensitive is like saying you are too blue eyed. Or intelligent.
It’s just that some people don’t see sensitivity for the gift that it is.
Yes, it comes with “side effects” that may be annoying to us personally, but that is OUR story to tell, not for someone else to impose on us.
These painful words are words of dismissal, particularly when they come from people we love, and their effects can be so brutal, especially to us sensitive and empathic souls.
What we need to guard against–or work towards healing if it has already happened– is internalizing these words. Believing they are true. Believing they mean there is something inherently wrong with us and it is too much for the world to handle. *
How often do we say it? “What is wrong with me?” Rolling our eyes at ourselves and getting angry. This is shame talking, shame that you don’t deserve.
Without our sensitivity there would be no subtle art, sublime music, or the “heart” in the best books. Beyond even what sensitive people can produce, without our sensitivity the world would be a dull and ordinary place.
I can’t say it enough — we need to love and care for ourselves because the world isn’t going to do it for us. And yes, we need more love and care than the average bear. So fill up! Fill yourself so that what pours out is beautiful.
Know that you are such a gift. Sensitivity and all.
*I understand developmental trauma can cause some forms of high sensitivity by changing the brain and how it reacts. So in effect there is something "different" about some of us, something "outside of normal." I'm referring more to thinking there is something wrong with our heart and soul, something wrong with what makes me ME, when I'm talking about thinking there is "something wrong with us." (I'll talk about this more in a future post.)