Welcome to day 11 of #write28days of Nervous System Regulation! Today’s topic is “name”.
I have several interesting stories about my name. They are probably only tangentially related to nervous system regulation, but I do believe that our search for self and becoming embodied can have a lot to do with one’s name and what one calls oneself.
Our names, they are so important aren’t they? In a way they define us – “Oh, that’s Amy!” It’s not Elizabeth or Lisa or Christina, it’s Amy. When someone says our name with love, it is wonderful, but if we have memories of people using our name in hate or anger, it is traumatizing.
My birth mother was told not to name me, and so I started out unlabeled… a nothing. This has bothered me for a long time, like a little stone stuck in my shoe.
I have to admit I have not liked my name over various periods of my life. It is so easy to whine it…AAAAmmeeeee.
At a few days old, my foster family named me Amy, which means “beloved.” When my adoptive family received me, it turns out they had also chosen Amy, without knowing that I had already been named that. So I am twice Beloved.
I did not always feel beloved growing up, but I know that there is One Person that loves me forever – God.
Susan, a fellow #write28days participant, said that HSP in HSPMom stands for “His Special Person.” I just love that so much!
Knowing that I am God’s Beloved is probably the only thing that keeps me from legally changing my name, reinventing myself. I don’t want to forget that.
Do you have a name or nickname that is special to you? I’d love to hear about it in the comments!