I was watching a Brave Writer video the other day on copywork and learning disabilities (linked below). In it, speech-language pathologist Rita Cevasco is talking about choosing the difficulty level of your students’ work when she says,
“You’re not learning how to swim when you are drowning.”
You are not learning how to swim when you are drowning.
Is anyone else having bells go off in their head when they hear that?
Not just about your students, but about you?
How often we are drowning as HSPs and moms?? The noise, the smells, the chaos and lack of sleep? The never-ending-ness of it if you are also homeschooling? Or have littles and are up at night so one day just blends into night and into the next day?
And how many of us just push and push through, telling ourselves that it shouldn’t be this hard, so we must be doing something wrong…it’s US so we’ll just keep trying to be like the non-HSPs next door.
Yet *denying* that that is my reality, that I am sometimes (often) drowning and not swimming, doesn’t help me any! “I should be able to do more! I should be able to stand this!” Saying these things does not make them true.
We need to learn to live within our abilities, even if they are less than we want, even if others are shaming us for them, even if we are “disappointing” people. In the end, that is on them, not you. It absolutely hurts when the condemnation gets aimed at us, but *they* are wrong, not you.
I know there are so many things we can’t drop if we are mothers and homeschoolers. SO. MANY.
But maybe we can jump way back, out of the minds of others where shame and condemnation live (sometimes our own minds are the worst for this), out of the culture that bases worth on productivity and usefulness, and think about ourselves and our own needs. Pray for wisdom about what is yours to carry.
When I’m not drowning, the gifts God has gifted me with get a chance to shine and be used. Little by little I’m learning to swim.
Here’s the Brave Writer Video.